The passing of time and the feeling of time passing are two very different things!  In the human experience, our internal clock is often misaligned with the universal clock.  While time is steady, at least in the perception of how we measure it, time in our experience can often feel fast or slow. (Yes, I believe there is a lot of validity to time dilation theory, but that is a different conversation).  One reason that the book of Psalms has become my favorite book in recent years is largely because of the expression of human experience that deeply resonates with my and the revelation of the character of God that helps me understand my feelings, circumstances and the reality of Hope.

In Psalm 13, we see one of those honest expressions, full transparency before God, with a cry of desperation.  In verse 1, the question is posed that many of us have felt and likely expressed in prayer.  Lord, did you forget about me, I feel forgotten, how long will you ignore my cries?  In the past I have done some ad-hoc surveys to ask people if they would rather be hated than forgotten.  Over 90% said hated, largely because to be forgotten is to not matter.  One friend of mine said she would hope that someone “would care enough to hate her rather than know that her existence did not matter at all.”  In verse 1, the Psalmist is getting at this feeling of being forgotten.  The language of “hide Your face from me” is to be understood that God doesn’t even acknowledge his existence, completely forgotten.  The “grief in my heart all day long” that the Psalmist expresses is an all encompassing, perpetual ache of thought and emotion that likely includes nervous stomach, overthinking, and overwhelming sadness.  He continues (verse 3) with a plea, please “consider me and answer me, O Lord my God. Enlighten my eyes, or I will sleep the sleep of death.”  At this point, the Psalmist is appealing for some sense of understanding in this situation because he could face death at the hands of his enemies (verse 4).

Verse 5 is the turning point for the Psalmist where he find his footing, so to speak.  He recognizes that his enemies find pleasure in him feeling fearful (v.4b), but he will not he shaken because he remembers the faithfulness of God.  His faith is restored because he knows his God is faithful and trustworthy, therefore he can rejoice.  I think it would be appropriate to say that he is describing the peace of Christ (Philippians 4:6-7).  In verse 3 he prayed that the eyes be enlightened and in verse 5, his vision is restored as he can now again see his life under the sovereign hand of God who has provided him salvation.  In Ephesians 1:18, Paul gives us a pray that the eyes of our hearts may be enlightened and I think that is a great prayer for times of distress.  It is common to all who walk with God to find ourselves in the fog of trials, and it is our nature to look at ourselves in those instances, but God is saying look to me, remember who I am, and recall the things that I have done for you.

The Lord’s acts of mercy indeed do not end, For His compassions do not fail.
²³ They are new every morning; Great is Your faithfulness.
²⁴ “The Lord is my portion,” says my soul, “Therefore I wait for Him.”
²⁵ The Lord is good to those who await Him, To the person who seeks Him.

Lamentations 3:22-25

Waiting on God is central to the Christian life for many reasons, but it is often magnified in times of turbulence.  What we learn here is that all of our life circumstances are under the sovereign governance of God, so every one of these encounters is an opportunity to grow our faith, and further the formation of Christ in us (Romans 8:29).  Our circumstances also temper our spirits so that we can be a light to others when they face these circumstances.  Much like Jonah praising God from the belly of the whale oceans and oceans deep, so the Psalmist also sings to the Lord amidst facing possible death.  In the moment, he felt abandoned, overcome by fear, but his prayer shaped him.  How often have we seen God come through for us when things looked hopeless?  If you don’t keep a journal, you should at least start writing down the faithfulness of God in your life as a source to remind ourselves that God is faithful and always right on time.  When we are shaped on the anvil of His will and emerge through the Refiners fire, we are further equipped to be a light to the world (Matthew 5:14) so that we can come along side folks in distress and share the love of God (2Corinthians 1:3-7), a light in the dark for someone that God is calling us to bring to the cross.  In Psalm 13, we see the appropriate response once we gather ourselves, take a deep breath, and remember that we are not alone on this journey.  Lastly, I share these verses about and below as reminders of who our God is.  Every morning, as we give thanks for another day, I find it good to pray, that no matter what the day holds, the Lord is my portion!  That is a good reminder that when storms arise in my life, I can wait on God to lead me through the storm, which by faith, calms the storm in me because the Lord is my portion.

 ⁶ For I am confident of this very thing, that He who began a good work among you will complete it by the day of Christ Jesus

Philippians 1:6

Prayer: Eternal God, heavenly Father, you have graciously accepted us as living members of your Son our Savior Jesus Christ, and you have fed us with spiritual food in the Sacrament of His Body and Blood.  Send us now into the world in peace and grant us strength and courage to love and serve you with gladness and singleness of heart, through Christ our Lord. Amen!