The mind of man plans his way, But the Lord directs his steps.

– Proverbs 16:9 

(When I wrote the first version of this article several years ago, the circumstances of my life may have influenced my position.  In revisiting this topic, there are multiple edits to the point that this is largely a rewrite, as experience has brought clarity that has changed my opinion on several key elements of this conversation.  As a result, I offer this revision which attempts to provide a high level overview of the heart work in discipline).  

What does it mean to find resolve?

It literally means to settle the matter; to make a final decision and to see it through; to erase doubt and not question the goal or objective.  I could go on, but you get it, it simply means to forge a path to the desired outcome.  In the pursuit of a disciplined life, one must first have resolve in order to achieve the desired goal or outcome.  While that might sound fairly simplistic on the surface, the underlying conditions of our hearts are a bit more complex.  We cannot simply think our way to discipline, rather we must align our thoughts with our actions.  What that means in reality is that it is not enough to have the knowledge and the desire, but we must also hunger for it, which means that we must learn to not hunger for the things that brought us to this point. In the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus said, “Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness.” (Matthew 5:6).  Jesus uses this terminology to impress upon us that the pursuit of righteousness is a craving and a thirst to be quenched.  In other words, it is something we cannot live without, we have to have it.

Discipline as Second Nature

Discipline itself is the steady course of action by which habits are formed, and the habituation of our adaptive unconscious is the path by which we develop discipline.  Simply stated, the repetition of habits is the building up of the discipline becoming second nature, at which time we do things automatically as a regiment of who we are, rather than the more laborious regiment of reasoning with ourselves to do something.

For example, let’s look at fitness.  If regular physical activity is part of your life such as running or lifting weights, then this should resonate with you.  If you have not exposed yourself to exercise for a long period of time, then the beginning of incorporating this into your life may seem difficult.  After the first workout or the first run, you may feel physical pain.  In addition, you may feel emotionally discouraged or defeated as the engagement may have proven to be more difficult than anticipated.  After a few engagement with exercise, you will come to a crossroads where the work necessary to achieve your goals is weighed against the motivation that provoked this engagement in the first place.  This moment of truth is where you begin to understand your true desire.  Several things could happen here, but before we continue, I need to point something out that is critical to success.  This is a difficult journey to travel alone.  When you look at the three scenarios to follow, the odds of continuing to press on increase exponentially when you have a support system.  Whether it is someone to encourage you, admonish you or join in with you for accountability, having another person will largely determine success.  Doing it alone will often feel like three steps forward and two steps back, and that will take its toll on your motivation, so enroll someone who truly wants to see you succeed.  Okay, now the roads before us:

1) you might get unconsciously stuck for a variety of reasons.  Whatever the reason, this will likely manifest in contradictory behavior that cancels out the regiment, such as driving thru Dunkin Donuts on the way home from the gym.  Simply going to the gym will not eliminate the desire for the things that got you here, so this is where your desires are tested, whatever they may be. We do make our plans, but then we need to be mindful of our steps, perhaps start with baby steps.  Go for a walk or at least park far, before signing up for a marathon.

2) you may realize that your motivation does not have deep roots and abandon the desire to change; this is your come to Jesus moment, and you realize that you do not desire what you thought you desired.  This can also be where you find out that maybe you have not given your best effort, so you make adjustments.  Perhaps you do not want to quit, but your situation feels hopeless.  I have hit this wall in the past.  I never had peace about giving up my dream, but it seemed hopeless. What I learned was that my desire is real and my frustration in the moment was necessary to test the depth of the roots of my desire, so in a sense my discouragement was a catalyst towards my resolve. 

3) you recognize that your motivations are deeply rooted and you find the grit to press-on though it seems hard at the time.  If you find yourself at #3, you will find that this decision to test your roots and find your grit is a daily choice to commit.  In a very loose sense, this is similar to our faith in God.  C.S. Lewis wrote that every morning when we awaken, our faith to trust God must begin all over again as if nothing has ever occurred.  In the same way, we daily must face the crossroads and choose the path to which we have resolved to travel.

Continuing with the exercise example, when you hit the wall, you may need to remind yourself or even say the words out loud, “I love this more than I want that” or perhaps you need to imagine what life would be like by staying the course or quitting.  The good news is that the repetition over time begins to strengthen our resolve.  At this point we have begun to re-habituate our hearts by re-engineering our thinking and our actions, we now hunger for our desires and daily renew our call to action.   For me personally, I have arrived at a place where I crave my workout and if I am unable to make it to the gym, I truly miss it.  To me this is encouraging because I can recall a time when it was hard and my goals seemed unrealistic, but now I find it hard to have a rest day which is a necessary part of weight training.  As an added motivation, once you see measurable results, that is like fuel in your tank, whether that is the number on the scale, your clothes fitting better or just having more energy, it’s inspiring.  For me personally, I thrive on encouragement, so when someone acknowledges my efforts or notices weight loss, that makes me go harder and the adrenaline from the encouragement often helps me take it to the next level.

At this time in my life, I would say that exercise is part of my lifestyle, a second nature.  Another part of my lifestyle is my morning prayer and reading my Bible.  To me, it is unthinkable to begin my day without communion with God, but it was not always this way.  Though my life of faith has been marked by reading and prayer, the hard part was making it a priority every morning, especially in the age of mobile devices and working remotely.  I often ask God to protect our time and shield me from calls as well as the temptation to check email, and I have to say that God answers that prayer.  A third major part of my pursuit of a disciplined life is with nutrition.  This has proven to be very difficult to be consistent, but it is getting better.  I am doing “clean eating” and seeing progress as I am stringing together more and more days without compromise.  The biggest challenge is that I have zero accountability and can really do whatever I want, when I want, so now I pray every morning that I would make wise choices in regards to nutrition, finances, time allocation and the words that I use with others.

Becoming holy and becoming human

In selecting Proverbs 16:9 at the opening of this writing, I did so because it shows the engagement of God in our lives and I think it wise to consider the presence of God in our pursuits and the matters in which we seek to find resolve in our lives.  In all of the life choices of a Christian, we must recognize that everything we do should be oriented towards making us fully holy and making us truly human.  The process of sanctification is the process of us becoming more holy as we grow spiritually (Hebrews 12:14).  This is the process of Christ being formed in us (Romans 8:29) also called our spiritual formation.  As Christ is formed in us, we are putting off sin, dying to self and becoming truly human (John 3:30; Colossians 3:5-25) which we will fully realize when we cross over into eternity, and the fullness of our humanity comes in the twinkling of an eye in the presence of divinity (Colossians 3:1-4).

Virtue and Duty

To be holy and to be human is not something that we likely think about in our pursuit of a disciplined life, but as we seek to have resolve, we are also seeking to align our temporary pursuits with our eternal purpose.  Whether that is to honor God with your body, pursue a God Honoring Marriage, fulfill our ministry, raise children, excel in the marketplace, or whatever we do, we are always seeking to do everything to the glory of God (1 Corinthians 10″31).  In order to keep this perspective, we need to recognize the tension within that makes us who we are, in order that we can grow in our resolve to live out our identity in Christ as a child of God (John 1:12; Romans 8:14-17; Ephesians 2:4-9; Psalm 139).

In speaking of the tensions within us, I am speaking of the struggle between virtues and vices.  In our call to grow in virtue, I think that dovetails well in the pursuit of growing in our resolve.  As we seek to change so our regiment becomes second nature, so our continued formation to be like Christ grows our virtue.  In the book, ‘Glittering Vices,’ the author provides an example using marriage.  There is a husband and a wife, happily married and faithful, however what is not obvious to anyone is what is going on in each others hearts.  The husband has the virtue of loyalty and for him, it is second nature to honor their marriage vows. Because loyalty is a virtue, he doesn’t face temptation from other woman, it is not ever a thought.  The wife in the example does not posses loyalty as a virtue, but rather as a duty.  She knows that committing adultery is wrong, and though she often is tempted and imagines herself with other men, her duty is driven by a moral compass to stay faithful.  For her, being faithful is harder at first, but over time her virtue grows and she too eventually overcomes temptation as loyalty takes root in her character.  In the same way, we are seeking to use our motivations (duty) to grow our resolve (virtue) that we can rehabituate our hearts, unlearn the behavior that holds us back and re-engineer our habits to become a second nature in which hunger for the new habits is still driven by motivations, but these now operate from at a sub-conscious level rather than the conscious motivation that presses to be intentional.

In closing, I would challenge you to put it to the test.  Pick one goal or desire, identify the things necessary to get there, be honest about what holds you back, and chart a course to get down this path.  By way of example, my goal is to improve my health by weight loss.  I have identified that I need to do clean eating for a variety of reasons that work for me, attempt to sleep at least 6 hours a night uninterrupted, and build muscle by lifting weights and having a target protein goal consistent with the clean eating program.  At this time, weight lifting has become second nature as I crave it, sleeping all night has not happened but has improved, and clean eating is more consistent and I make good choices most of the time, but I am making progress consistently.  My resolve is strong on my overall goal, but my action items are still under construction, though my measurable results show that I am going in the right direction and the good so far outweighs the bad!